Avoidant people pull back *after* closeness — the retreat is triggered by intimacy and comes with visible discomfort. Uninterested people don't pull back, because they were never close enough to. They just stay at a constant, comfortable, low distance.
'Avoidant' is not a diagnosis you can hand someone, and it's not a reason to wait indefinitely. It explains behaviour. It doesn't excuse the cost of it.
Look at what precedes the distance. If a good night together is reliably followed by three quiet days, that's avoidance. If nothing precedes it because nothing good is happening, that's disinterest.
“i've noticed things go quiet after we've had a really good time. what's that about for you?”
“the post-nice-evening silence is becoming a genre”
“i need to know if you actually want this, because i can't tell.”
The read above is the general one. Describe what actually happened and I will tell you whether this is the right page — and what the paid decode would do with your details.
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Was It Casual is for reflection, not therapy or professional advice.