The bare minimum is easiest to spot by how you talk about him. If you find yourself defending fairly ordinary behaviour as though it were generous — 'he did text back', 'he did remember' — you've recalibrated downward without noticing.
Wanting more is not entitlement, and having standards is not being difficult.
Would you be impressed by this if a friend described it? That's the whole test, and it works every time.
“i've been thinking about what i actually want from this, and it's a bit more than where we are.”
“the bar is on the floor and you keep limbo-ing under it, respectfully”
“i want consistent effort. if that's not something you want to give, that's ok, but i need to know.”
The read above is the general one. Describe what actually happened and I will tell you whether this is the right page — and what the paid decode would do with your details.
Your words are sent to our server and to Claude — the AI behind Tess — which writes the read. Not stored, not linked to you. How this works
Every situation and every quiz on this site is free. Tess’s reads — written around your own words, not everyone’s — are the paid part. iPhone and Android to follow.
Was It Casual is for reflection, not therapy or professional advice.