Checking is a compulsion loop: it briefly relieves anxiety, then creates more, so you check again. Each look feels like it's gathering information and is actually just refreshing the wound at intervals you control.
It doesn't mean you're not over it or that you're pathetic. It means a habit formed and habits need friction, not willpower.
You don't need to stop wanting to look. You need to make looking take four steps instead of one. Mute, unfollow, move the app, log out.
“(mute, don't block. it's quieter and needs no announcement.)”
“(archive the chat. future you says thanks.)”
“(no message. this one's entirely yours to fix and it's fixable.)”
The read above is the general one. Describe what actually happened and I will tell you whether this is the right page — and what the paid decode would do with your details.
Your words are sent to our server and to Claude — the AI behind Tess — which writes the read. Not stored, not linked to you. How this works
Every situation and every quiz on this site is free. Tess’s reads — written around your own words, not everyone’s — are the paid part. iPhone and Android to follow.
Was It Casual is for reflection, not therapy or professional advice.